I have noticed that I am being drawn with greater regularity to writing about releasing fear, owning all parts of our journey, and learning to love ourselves as perfectly imperfect people. It’s amusing to me that I ever questioned my focus given that I wrote the post below years ago. This was the first blog entry I ever created. So much has happened since I wrote these words, yet the message remains.
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When you look at yourself, what do you see? Does it all make sense to you, and do you like every part of that picture? When I look deep within, I sometimes find that I have questions. I see parts that are beautiful, bright and fun. I see elements of joy, moments of unshakeable faith, and acts of kindness that make me smile. I love these pieces of me. But then I notice other parts that don’t appear to continue that wonderful trend. There are remnants of doubt, frustration and sometimes anger. At times, there are places that seem dark and cold. I see colors that clash and mismatched patterns.
How do these fit into the same package? I cannot fathom how this mix of light patches and dark patches will possibly come together to become something worth keeping and definitely can’t see them fitting together to become something spectacular.
But then I remember the one thing that matters more than anything else. I am not the creator of the artwork being molded. While I strongly believe that I have creative input via free will and the choices this allows me to make, I know that it is not my hand that guides the design of my soul.
I have spent so much time trying to unbreak and fix those parts that I don’t understand, don’t want to recognize, and don’t want to be – but these are part of me and part of my design. I may not understand the dark patches, but I don’t think that my comprehension is required on this journey. Maybe the moments of darkness act as contrasts to allow the beautiful light parts to really shine.
I believe that it is time to let go of the idea that we are broken and need to be fixed. The light and the dark fragments come together to form a masterpiece of God’s creation. When I look at myself with this in mind, I’m not sure how it could get any more awesome and spectacular than that. And that’s what I see when at look at you, too.
If we want to add to the creative mix, let’s use that wonderful free will to make choices that make us feel light and wonderful. Maybe we can go with choices that help others feel the same way, too. In the meantime, let’s embrace all the colors, all the moments and all the blessings because we are patchwork souls with a heavenly designer.
Momentum of Joy 