My daughter is typically carefree or running full throttle in high energy mode (no idea where she got that!). But when she starts to worry, she reeeeaaally digs deep. One frequent concern she raises is with regard to going away for college. She doesn’t know where to go or what she will specialize in, but she is certain that she wants to stay close to home. She brings it up over and over again, and I continue to reinforce that we will be supportive of whatever choice she selects. At that point, I also remind her that she is six years old.
And then this evening she brought up how she wanted to live with us in the new house forever (we are building a new house that is supposed to be THE house we will live in for many many years to come, or if my husband gets his way, until the kicking of the bucket has come to pass). So when she mentioned living with me in the house, she also wanted to discuss her being able to sleep in my bed when she was older and also a mom. At this point, I asked her if she was planning to be married but also quickly clarified that her older brother would not be a suitable marital option – talk about a buzzkill! (She didn’t know that was against the rules.) Well after she recovered from that bombshell, she decided that a couple of boys she knew “would work.”
I explained that there were still a few remaining points she might need to contemplate. 1. Most married men don’t want to sleep with their in-laws (Don’t tell me if you do. No part of me wants to know that.). 2. She could wait a bit and pick someone down the road who might be the perfect fit at that time. 3. She didn’t even have to get married if she didn’t want to. That was a great choice, too, if it was what she decided.
Well she was still struggling with the whole “husband not wanting to sleep in the same bed as his wife’s mother” thing but I told her that I was pretty inflexible in this department. Nevertheless we agreed that she could live with me forever and ever if that was her choice. Thankfully that soothed her little soul.
I don’t know why she stresses about all this stuff, but it absolutely plagues her. She melts my heart completely and totally. I adore that she loves us so much that she can’t imagine ever leaving us, and I certainly don’t look forward to the moment when she will.
I wonder if this is how God sees us. All wrapped up in our worries and waiting for the sky to come crashing down on us at any moment. Although we aren’t sure how our lives will play out, we will always be cared for and we will always have a safe loving place to call home – forever and ever. And that soothes my little soul.
Much love and light to all of you. Joanna